I don't normally post something like this, but I felt such a rush of emotion after seeing this picture that I couldn't not comment. It's stupid, I know, but I had to.

In the past few weeks, I've felt lost in this fandom. I just felt like I don't fit in anywhere anymore. My point is not my PMS though:

When I saw this, I started crying. I know half of it is because I'm totally PMSing right now, but it's the truth. Literally broke down and just cried. I don't know if it's his fluttered eyes, or her blush, or just everything about it. I just -I remember why I'm still in love with them so. Why they sparkle far more than any Edward ever could. Why when I look at them and see everything they've gotten through, I want to spend the rest of my life in a relationship like theirs. They're beautiful - their love is beautiful.I guess I realized that write because they give me a reason to. They make me happy. It's not about pleasing anyone, it's not about failure. I've made A LOT of mistakes since my hiatus. I've never been exceptionally good at anything, I've never had an incredible talent or been the best at anything. But none that matters. They've given me an excuse to be happy, and I'm finding that happiness again. It's going to take sacrifices, but I'm going to be happy -even if it means I won't share it with anyone else.

Vanessa... Happy Birthday. Zac and Vanessa, I love you guys more than anything.

I stumbled across the Zac News Thread the other day and was greeted with a debate about whether or not it would be beneficial for Zac’s career to be involved with the sequel to Hairspray. My opinions on the matter aren’t really to be discussed because I don’t want to bring on anything that may offend anyone. It’s Zac’s choice and whether or not I think it’s a good idea is irrelevant. I’m not Zachary Efron, I’m Kelly. And unless Zac decides he wants an overly-energetic blonde haired seventeen-year old as his significant other, I don’t matter.

However, it did get me thinking a lot about sequels.

I’ve been back and forth since June on what I want to do with this crazy idea in my head to continue one of my stories. Literally, I feel like I’ve tried everything: writing through it, not writing at all, thinking about it, taking notes on it, rereading, trying a different story, making a banner… the whole shee-bang. Basically, what the whole Zac controversy opened my eyes to the real problem here… and that’s timing.

If I had come up with this idea a year and a half ago, it wouldn’t be a big deal. Hell, maybe if I had come up with this scheme a year ago it would be okay. But this is two years later on January 6^th. I’m not the girl I was back then –I’ve had experiences and relationships that have shaped me to be more sure of myself and where I stand in this world. This also does not mention the fact that the majority of my original readers have long left to bigger and better things in this world –maybe I should to. The fandom is dying, slowly but surely it's not as strong as it used to be. Maybe I need to just let go of coffee and yoga rooms and move on and get over the fact that I can’t write that story again. Would you want to watch an actor play the same role after two years of not filming what so ever? I won’t write the way I used to, and I’m too scared to kill something so close to my heart. Which, that’s all it is. Time Changes Everything was not High School Musical itself as I sometimes tie it to. It’s not something everyone loved or everyone thinks is their favorite story. It’s not epic it’s just… TCE. That’s it, done. Why try to bring something back if it has no reason to?

This is not The Distance Between Us, which Diana could so perfectly turn around because it’s not too old and she’s grown, but in a positive way that she still has a grasp on how she wrote back then. The other “big” sequel lately is California Dreams, which is still new and fresh and everyone loves. You have to blow dust off to see these characters, you have to remember who they are. Do I even remember? I’ve gone over them so many times I feel like I could recite it, but would I really be able to harness what I once had? And then, timing. I feel like my Cinderella fantasy strikes at midnight on January 6^th, 2010. I feel like after two years have passed, it’s done. I’m not going to be finished with Fourteen Minutes at that time. I don’t know if I can write something over two years old.

And yet…

Time Changes Everything and Never Let Go are runninequalslife, at least in my eyes. They’re who I am –they’re who I come from. It’s not that I just want to write these characters again. The plot I have is made for them. I’ve tried so many ways to try and twist it so I could just start a fresh story out, but I can’t. I can’t do it without dick-head-cocky-face Troy and doesn’t-take-shit Gabriella. I can’t do it without Bradin. I just can’t do it without them. And the idea… it hasn’t gone away. Obviously, it’s something important if I’ve been obsessing over the same concept for six and a half months now. I've been working on it, slowly but surely it's coming. It's just... really frustrating.

This is stupid; it shouldn’t be a big deal. It’s not a big deal. It’s fanfiction goddammit. But, I don’t know. It’s a big deal to me. I wish there was a way i could just shake a magic dice and it would tell me if I was meant to write it or not. I wish there was a sure fire answer. But there's not.

Let me know if you have any thoughts –or let me know if I’m annoying as hell cuz I won’t shut up about it.

( Because I want Troy Bolton Under My Tree... )

So, as a lot of you know. I toured Madison yesterday. My friends were throwing a fit about it because they said I should have toured before I applied -but I didn't listen. I'm kinda glad I didn't... while going through the whole tour, everything just felt right. I don't know how to explain it, but the town is so very, me. I live in the suburbs fairly close to a large city... but Madison is so diverse and I would live in the heart of the city. There's so much to do, and I know I'm not going to do everything I want to... but I'm gonna try to take advantage of the time I have. It's a big school, which I want.

What I'm stuck on right now is the dorm aspect. I have two options, one is the urban/apartment style and the other is beside the lake but much more quieter. The problem is that I love the urban aspect of the one dorm, it's exactly like how I'd want to live if I ever moved into a big city. However I like the idea of coming back to quiet after the day. Plus this dorm as an access to a trail that I can run on. The only thing would be that I feel because it's a little smaller... it's going to be with introverted people. I'm an extrovert so I don't know. But the dorm isn't THAT small... it's still almost 600 people compared to the 1200 in the other one. I don't know.

I feel like I need to work on Fourteen Minutes, but I just... I've been everywhere with my writing BUT there. I feel like my confidence has dropped a lot... for no really apparent reason I guess. I feel like my fear of the story came true. So for the past couple days I've worked on something else. We'll see... maybe I'll get inspiration soon or something.

My hair's dark again... it looks better, not as intensely blond. Physically I feel pretty okay about myself lately. Which is weird, because I'm not running as much as I used to. But I feel like I'm not eating as much either. I guess the two sorta go hand in hand.

I'm going to visit friends in college this weekend. I'm excited -and a little nervous I guess. But more excited. I just kinda wanna let go for once.

And um... it took three and a half months later but I um... I finally uh...got a text back. And this is real. Not a muse I've made up from my imagination. It was weird I guess... I don't know. I've tried not to think about it after my zombie experience with The Missed Call but um... I guess three months is better than nothing. And he apologized. I kinda wanna know if he's up to something though. I guess I just don't get it.

Something very... shocking happened to me yesterday...

I had been sitting in photography –a pathetic class that I achieve nothing in and only took it so it would look good for Madison. Now that I’ve gotten in, I’m dropping it at semester and taking a release. It’s stupid… we’ve had only two projects and it’s the end of November. I’m not interested; although I think photography could be cool… it’s just not my thing.

Anyways, back to important matters. My two friends were sitting across from me working on calculus. Thankfully, (since I lack in the math area. Not terrible, I just think it’s pointless after Algebra II. I mean really, who the hell is going to use limits in real life?) I’m in stats so the only work I have to do over break is give a survey. They were frustrated but talking to each other, occasionally apologizing for being boring. I didn’t really care, I was more than amused when he’d throw his pencil down and she’d smack her palm to her face and ask if he even learned what 2+2 was.

(note: the rest is not real. Again, I’m not schizophrenic)

So there I was, minding my own business and trying to avoid my teacher –who kinda looks like Moses by the way- because he would probably drag me into the dark room where he’d give a 50 minute lecture than anyone else could give in five. I looked around for a bit, glancing at the clock every few seconds when I suddenly felt a pair of warm arms around me.

Key word: warm.

I jumped, my heart slamming into my chest. However, I was motionless. My eyes lifted to see no one else had noticed him. They were still busy configuring cosine and other useless information. No one heard me yelp in surprise.

His muscles managed to curl around the back of the chair, ticking my abdomen. He placed his lips on my ear, his breath hot against my cheek as he whispered oh-so-seductively, “Miss me?”

I had no choice; I nodded feverously –completely under his spell. The ass chuckled, fingers rubbing against my stomach and making me remember exactly what it was that made me fall in love with him in the first place. “Why are you here?”

My muse chuckled, finally allowing me to see a hint of his blazing blue eyes before he nodded towards the door, “He said you were pissed and wanted me back.”

I thought maybe it was a dream –that both of them were in the same room at the exact same time. My skin prickled, there was tension boiling in the room surrounding us. I caught his topaz stare and felt my heart aflutter once again. My muse noticed, clenching his grasp on me protectively.

“Edw…” I started, but he held his hand up, white as freshly fallen snow.

“I don’t want to come between you two,” his velvet voice was like a forbidden fruit that I so desperately wanted to taste, “it’s selfish to ask that you leave him for me. I cannot allow myself to do that to you. Not after the damage I caused.”

My muse growled in my ear, “Damn him.”

I scolded his name, not impressed by the immaturity, “I don’t want to choose.”

“Oh for the love of…”

“I’m willing,” the figure in the doorway, skin glittering like diamonds under the florescent lighting, cut my muse off before he could continue, “to compromise.”

The muse snorted, “Shocking.” He muttered sarcastically. So I smacked his head.

I could bore you with the details of the conversation that occurred just under the noses of my friends, completely oblivious to this struggle between the two. We drew diagrams, constructed ideas. My muse bantered with him, fighting for control that was somewhat pointless. I knew what had to be done.

I… erm… we’ve decided that after I’m finished nightly with my muse in the yoga room, I’m going to fly to Volterra and TRY to form a relationship with… the other guy. Try is the key word. If it doesn’t turn out, if something goes terribly wrong and I feel I can’t manage the flight any longer, I will rip my plane tickets in half and stay with my muse. At least I can say I tried, that I’m attempting to challenge myself.

So… my muse is back, talking to me. And I have to admit… I missed him a little.

(NOTE: If you didn’t get any of that, don’t worry. It’s not a big deal… but I’ve actually written in the past two days. I’m proud of myself.)

Two Days. Two ‘effin days.

The last time I was this excited about a movie, it was 17 Again. Everyone’s talking about it, I just finished rereading a couple days ago, I’m reading Twilight Fanfiction, one of my best friends have finally decided to read the Twilight series before she sees any of the movies (she’s an h-core Harry Potter fan, so didn’t want to become a Twilight fan, but now she’s in love because she’s a hopeless romantic). I’m so incredibly exited. We made the t-shirts today. I felt bad because the paint we used broke before she could use it, but mine turned out really well. Yes, I’m a loser and took pictures:

Yes, I put my shirt by my Vanity Fair... don't laugh.



God, this is gonna be so epic. The movie’s at 7. I’m kind of happy I’m not going at midnight. When I went to Harry Potter, I could barely remember what happened and I wanted to sleep half the time –that was in the summer when I could actually sleep in too. I don’t care if everyone will have seen it already. I’m so pumped. Italy is by FAR my favorite scene. It’s going to be worth just going to see that. God I can’t wait.

Um… currently work owns my life. I work more days this week then I have class. It’s sad, really. Last night, I was training some girl and then they decided to actually put me to work. I guess the head people from my work were like coming today, so they made me clean the registers. I wanted to cry it was so disgusting. Ugh… one of them smelled like body order.

And the update on the muse:

The guy’s an asshole.

I knocked on his door every day this week, multiple times without so much of a hello. I thought that maybe we could be adults and talk this out, but he didn’t answer. I told him to meet me in the coffee room if he wanted to talk this out, that I was sorry and we’re strong, so we’re gonna get through this. So I waited, in the coffee room four two hours until I finally heard a door creak open. My heart skipped a beat…

Until I saw that he rolled a basketball in with a taped “knock yourself out” on the surface. I could have murdered him.

Someday he’s gonna have to forgive me…

…but for the time being: New Moon.

(Note: before anyone starts reading this, I want everyone to know despite how insane this journal entry sounds, I am not schizophrenic. I do not believe that there is really a Troy Bolton running around my house. I just loved to play pretend when I was a little kid, so it’s fun to make references to how my writing is going by making them characters. If anyone gets confused or bored, I’m not offended. I actually understand. This entry is purely derived from procrastination and me trying to be creative but failing epically. It’s supposed to be me having fun)

Guys… I think I messed up… big time…

It all started two days ago when I was really randomly at my low. Yesterday, after I posted the previous entry, I immediately went running to try to clear my mind. I wanted Troy (for those of you who don’t know, Troy is my infamous muse) to come with. I wanted to map out the next couple chapters I’m writing for Fourteen, but I was really, really upset with myself and I just… I needed him. However, before I left… we got into a fight… again.

I was so angry. I needed him and he ran away. Like a scared little boy (quoting Taylor), he decided to slam the door and told me to leave him alone until it was a good time for him. I was so mad, so unbelievably mad that I slammed the door and ran the fastest run since state (note: this running part is true. Me doing events is true, but the muse parts are not).

So I was um… I was in English today and my mind was on anything but poetry. It started to wander back to our fight. I was fidgeting and looked down at the contents on my desk and saw a book. A book with a single rose on it.

And then on cue… he sat down by me. (another note: He is not a real person.).

He was much more beautiful then I remembered –scorching eyes, inviting lips, persuading hair. He had this charm to him, so much contrasted to the cocky swagger of Troy. He told me he missed me, he pushed back my hair and told me he had a plan. I asked him then and there what it was, but he told me he wanted to tell me when we were alone.

So I invited him to the yoga room and…

I cheated on Troy.

It didn’t last long. I felt too guilty for anything serious to happen, but I did it. I couldn’t help it, the temptation was there like forbidden fruit and I couldn’t deny those eyes attention. He was so different from Troy, so much scarier. He was there when Troy wasn’t. He held me when I poured out my frustrations. He promised he would have an idea. Previously, we had flirted once before but never actually acted upon our feelings.

Immediately after it happened, I couldn’t hold it in. So I ran to Troy and confessed. Tears were spilt, but he was silent. Eyes navy with disgust and rage, he rose with silence and slammed the door in my face. I haven’t seen him since.

Now I don’t know what to do. I love Troy and need to talk to him. I need to make things right but being with… him… felt right too. Most of you would not like him, actually I can only think of one of you who might be happy of this news. He may never come back again, but he is now a possibility.

I need to talk to Troy. We have to work things out. I miss him, I want him to come back.

It’s gonna be a lonely night again.

(okay, so that was probably the most fun writing I’ve had in like… a week. Basically, in non-writer language, I got a random inspiration and started something I don’t think any of you would read or like except maybe one and now I’m trying to find the motivation to write Fourteen again.)

Troy, if you’re reading this somewhere, I want to talk. Please.

I did a bit of soul searching last night and came up with a bunch of things that I feel like musing about.

I received a review to the latest chapter of Fourteen Minutes that shook me -a lot. It basically stated my complete fear for the story and my frustration while writing it. I was scared, again my terror was true and I felt as a failure. I was going to write that night, but was so horrified with myself that I immediately went to bed and curled under the covers listening to John Mayer because I needed to think. I know the story may not be "the best", but I'm trying. So hard I'm trying because I love to write -it's my passion whether I'm good or not.

But instead, I started getting lost about other things and realized a lot. And a big problem is fanforum.

The site and I really don't get along, and it made it known to me that I should stay away when I first started lurking while writing Never Let Go. Don't get me wrong, it's fabulous for easy going discussions about characters and couples and random stuff like that. But I've constantly become consumed. There is no specific problem, but lately every time I leave the site, I feel depressed. I'm not targeting it, I think it's fantastic and I've met wonderful people and read amazing fanfiction and had really helpful conversations about everything from what color eye shadow to wear for prom to whether or not Troy's reasons were legit for being a douche in HSM2. But writing is harder than it was before, and I feel like I'm spending MUCH less time doing the thing I truly love then thudding when something comes through my inbox. I love when people get into deep discussions about fic or vent if they have a problem, but the majority of the time now, people just post "updates?". There's nothing wrong with it and I'm very guilty of doing it as well, but I would much rather be around when we're discussing something. I feel sometimes people are out to make me "feel better" by lying and saying things when the only thing I've ever wanted was honesty.

However, I don't want people to think that I don't like the site. I do, I love it but I think that too much of something is a bad thing in some cases. This applies for me personally, but not for some others. So I'm not really sure what I'm going to do.I went on a detox about two weeks ago and I took off two nights, and last night I wrote more in one sitting than I had in a week. Of course I'm going to lurk, of course I'm still going to be around. But I'm considering maybe picking like two days a week I'll fangirl or I can only do it after I finish a chapter or something. I'm still working out the logistics.

I also have something else I would like to discuss, but my next author's note is dedicated to this so I do not want to kick a dead horse. It has to do with my favorite pet peeve of mine.

I'm not bitching or ranting either, I'm just musing.

Okay, onto another note...

NEW MOON'S IN LESS THAN NINE FUCKING DAYS!

I'm so excited, so unbelievably excited. I feel as though I'm once again connecting to the "old Kelly" (the offical timeline of "old Kelly" is before I came out on fanforum). The Kelly who stayed up late and reading fic and then hiding the light so she could read Eclipse and her parents wouldn't threaten that she'd be super tired in the morning if she didn't sleep now. I've had three New Moon discussions today with different people, and I've just... god I'm so pumped. My friend and I are making t-shirts this year. I'm so pumped and excited. I'm falling in love with Edward all over again.

And I know I go in waves with Rob, but after reading the Vanity Fair article I really like him again -despite the drunkenness. He's a lot like me: he's insecure about himself when he doesn't necessarily need to be. I love the shoot, I'm physically attracted to him once again. It's so interesting to see how different he and Zac are. Zac's so sure of himself, yet Rob sometimes seems as though he thinks someone else could be better. I love Zac, obviously, but Ir eally like reading a side of someone else too.

If you haven't gotten it, please go pick it up.

I have a future.

 Not just any future either, like a real life legitimate future.

 Today started out normal, I had to write this stupid essay about enlightenment then go run out and get coaches gifts for cross. I kinda thought it was a hassle, but figured it would be the last year I’d ever have to do it. Well, I went to go to this running store to get gift cards but found out that the store didn’t even open until noon, so I did what any warm blooded American teenager would do and drove to the mall. While inside Victoria’s Secret, I was looking at all the sweats and stuff and saw the sweats that had the university of my choice’s on all these sweat shirts. It was a painful reminder that I still could end up living in a cardboard box for the rest of my life.

 So kinda shrugging the nerves off, I went to my banquette. It was way too long for my own good, but when I came home I decided to take my daily check of the university’s website. And there it was, the one word that made my heart stop beating. “Congratulations!”

 I got in.

 I’m so unbelievably excited right now. I mean, this is a school that was tough to get into. It’s a huge campus, but… it’s where I’ve wanted to go since I was six. I was a bit nervous that maybe my ACT score wasn’t JUST right or that I spent too much time writing Troy’s abs than volunteering like I should have. But I’m in. And it feels so good.

 I have a future.

Before I begin, I would just like to inform everyone that I have completely cursed myself for all time. I should have never, EVER picked the number 14. It’s officially haunting me.

 Let me give you a scene: I’m standing outside of the bathroom, glancing at these random quotes on “you know you’re a runner when…” and one of my teammates approaches me. She’s holding a program and opens to our page, with the list of the line up facing up and raises her eyebrow.

“Hey Kel, what’s your lucky number again?”
“Uh… eight, why?”
She holds up the program, “Because I thought it was 6… and I was gonna make your day by telling you you’re 614.”

 So of course, my heart stops beating and my eyes grow wide because I got a fourteen in my number. Coincidence, but flippin’ awesome coincidence. And to make things better, our team took fourteenth also (our second runner was sick, but it was really just an honor to be up there).

 Anyways, this weekend was probably one of the most memorable I will experience in my high school career. The night before was like, freaky because while we were eating dinner at some pasta place, some waitress dropped a glass and suddenly, the lights went out. Apparently the entire block was out of power for some bizarre reason, so we had to eat dinner by candle light. It was creepy cuz it was the night before Halloween and everything. So, after like a half hour of running around with their heads cut off, we finally got our food. We went back to the hotel only to find that the power was out there too. It wasn’t for like another twenty minutes that we FINALLY got it back.

 The meet itself was… indescribable. There’s no other meet I would want to leave on. Just running at state was, unreal. Honestly, the pain wasn’t there. Yes, the course was the most difficult because it was all rolling hills, but the entire race just felt like a blur. Of course I went through the normal routine: power bar 2 hours before my race, listening to my playlist while walking the course and ending on NON and Scream (in that order), coffee a half hour before… everything seemed like any other time but this was state. I gave another speech which wasn’t very long this time, but it was decent. Then the run outs… holy shit my legs were shaking, although half of it could be from the fact that it was only 35 degrees while we ran. Yeah, it was SNOWING. But I didn’t feel it. It was just… an amazing feeling. One that I’m most definitely going to treasure.

 Cross Country… oh how I’m going to miss thee. But I couldn't imagine leaving any other way.

I feel like musing. I usually have a purpose for my LJ posts but I feel like just posting for the hell of it today. Whether people read it or not is whatever, but I feel like procrastinating and being random. Maybe it's nerves? Jitters? Who knows. But I'm going to do it.

State. Oh my god I'm so unbelievably excited. The team's pumped, all I've been listening to are songs that are going to get me fired up. I just... I can't wait. Basically, we have a five day week and three of my five days are devoted to this trip and preparation, but it's totally worth it. This week was awesome, because the entire school was like all pumped for us. It was an incredible feeling, to know that I would be running on this team that was about to make history. I could have done without the random people who I've talked to like... once come up to me and say how excited they are, but like being dressed in the State shirt (we cut off the sleeves because they shirts were effin' HUGE) and having everyone all ecstatic... I'm so pumped. Like, it means a lot because my sister was always the "good" runner: the one who was supposed to follow in my dad's (who was state champion when he was in HS) footsteps. I don't know... everyone always says I compare too much but it feels so good that I finally got to do something she never did, as a captain too. I just… God I can’t wait.

 I’m really excited about my Drawing and Painting class too. I’ve always liked to draw, but I never really thought I was good at it. But I took it because I liked to do it and it’s my senior year so I thought I would just do it for fun. And I’m actually decent. We had to draw hands, and mine was presented in the front display case (where most of the good ones are). And now I’m doing a still life of my spikes (surprise, surprise), and they look awesome. I’m just… I love doing it. My mom was all cute the other day and was like “I’ve never seen you this passionate about something!” I kinda snickered and wanted to be like “You should see me write.” But I figured that was a bad idea.

 At sectionals, I wrote the girls a “speech” about how they should stay motivated, and all the parents came up to me afterwards and were like “You’re really good at that!” I laughed it off, but secretly had a fiesta because my writing was actually being recognized outside the world of Troy Bolton. I was pumped.

 A lot of things are just working out for me right now and it feels awesome from where I was at the end of the summer, thinking that I was going to be left alone while the asshole was fucking around at college. But things have turned up lately, faster than I anticipated. Like, I was never really in a completely bad spot, but it hurt like hell. But, as I should have known because of my moto that everything happens for a reason, only good things came of his cut off. Because of the incident, my social circle is now with the people I’ve always wanted to hang around instead of the supposed “best friend” who was really just into bragging about herself and being a twofaced idiot –let alone ALWAYS being in a bad mood and obsessing about a boy who thought she stalked him.

 I’m on fanforum detox right now. Before I started writing Fourteen, I told myself I wasn’t going to let that site get to me. But I forgot how bipolar I get about it while writing, so I just decided to lurk for awhile –maybe just a few weeks or so. I don’t want to get swept up in the edge I had been in for awhile.

 And the clock is ticking til the gun sound… I can’t wait.

I've had the best morning of my life. Seriously, I know it may not mean that much to the other people here because I'm a baby in this fandom, but I'm so utterly excited I can't help but share. This morning was sectionals for cross country. And our team has worked so incredibly hard this year. Our HS isn't exactly known for its sports, and our CC team hasn't gone to state since 1992. We get crap for not being as good as our rival school and all of us wanted to prove them wrong. So going this morning on this bus, everyone was shaking with nerves and fear. It could have been my last meet, and I was terrified.

But we're going. We're going to state. This is so unbelievably surreal. Like... I'm going to be on the team that goes to state. I’m going to run at state. I just… we’ve all dreamt about this for so long and I’m just… I can’t grasp it yet. But I’m so unbelievably excited. This week is going to be a huge hustle and bustle, but I’m so ecstatic. I can’t remember a time I’ve been this happy. I just… damn it’s a good day.

And because we're going to state cross country, I need to post a picture of Steve Prefontaine because he is a running god.

Okay, so it's Zac's birthday and basically everyone has given sometime this weekend... except for me. And I know I'm probably digging myself a huge, gigantic hole, but I feel a need to put something up as well. I didn't want to do Fourteen Minutes because well... everyone was going to update tonight and I'm still waiting on my origional day. However, Zac is the reason I'm writing in this fandom, so I think I need to celebrate right.

I must explain first.

In June, I began writing this chapter. This tiny little chapter and went back and forth whether I wanted to make it known or not. I informed everyone in one of my PF a/n that I wrote a chapter and a half of a sequel to one of my more popular fics. And this is it. I started writing with the working title of Love Changes Everything, because I'm too in love with my muse. I don't know if this will ever be continued, I dabble with it every once in awhile when I'm stuck with FM, but for the moment it's staying in the runninequalslife vault. Except for tonight. So... here's a secene from the first chapter of Time Changes Everything's sequel, so please just enjoy and remember that I wrote this back in June, so please remember that I've been working on my writing since then.

I will not be posting this in place of FM. Please don't ask me to, because I've been working my ass off with FM. It will be coming soon... I promise.

Happy Birthday Zac. You're fantastic.

 

For one week, recommend / share:
Day 1: A song
Day 2: A picture
Day 3: A book/ebook/fanfic
Day 4: A site
Day 5: A youtube clip
Day 6: A quote
Day 7: Whatever tickles your fancy

A site. Hmm... I'm not very internet savvy other than fanfiction, facebook, and anything Zac related, so I'm going to pick... FF.net cuz it's like my life.
http://www.fanfiction.net/

For one week, recommend / share:
Day 1: A song
Day 2: A picture
Day 3: A book/ebook/fanfic
Day 4: A site
Day 5: A youtube clip
Day 6: A quote
Day 7: Whatever tickles your fancy

This was probably the toughest decision I've ever had to make on LJ. Okay, so I'm embellishing, but still. My online world revolves around fanfic, and I couldn't decide which one I wanted to pick. There are so many that are so awesome right now and I'm so proud of the authors. So I'm picking a book and I finally chose a fic too, even though I was probably ripping out my hair on chosing one.

Okay, so...

Book: I chose The Pact by Jodi Picoult. A lot of people know I'm a huge fan of hers, and this is probably one of my favorite books well... ever.  It's a best friends turned lovers story, but Emily commits suicide and Chris is trialed as guilty. Jodi's a brilliant author, and if I could have the amount of talent in one cubic inch of her pinkie, I would be satisfied. Here's an excerpt:

For one week, recommend / share:
Day 1: A song
Day 2: A picture
Day 3: A book/ebook/fanfic
Day 4: A site
Day 5: A youtube clip
Day 6: A quote
Day 7: Whatever tickles your fancy

For a picture, I decided on a beach because it is my favorite place in the universe. If I could forever say there, I would.

Yes, the clock is ticking. I've been sending random PMs/Emails/Blahs to some people to ask for their opinions on certain matters that are unrelated to the story, but just the way I write in general. I'm currently going back and forth on something but I think I've straightened it out and made my decision. My muse and I have been discussing (yes, discussing, not yelling or arguing which is shocking) and I've got two dates in mind for when Fourteen is going up, since I'm ahead of schedule but I'm not sure yet. I'm sure the writer in me would have a spark to know which day is right.

And since Diana and Abs and Van and everyone else is doing this, I'm joining the bandwagon.

For one week, recommend / share:
Day 1: A song
Day 2: A picture
Day 3: A book/ebook/fanfic
Day 4: A site
Day 5: A youtube clip
Day 6: A quote
Day 7: Whatever tickles your fancy

This I had to think about for a bit, because I went between Far Away, which is my favorite of all time, Wild at Heart, which was the last song I heard with him, or the one I picked. So, I picked Energy, by Keri Hilson. The reason I picked this one is because I knew that I wanted Troy and Gabi to break up in Protecting Fate since before the story was even published. I had never done an actual "break up" scene before, so I new I wanted to give a real one a shot. As the chapters progressed, I found this song and just played it on repeat over and over and over and over again. I'd run, drive, sleep, eat with it playing. I had the scene played out in my head, I knew what I wanted exactly to this song. Even though the song doesn't COMPLETEY describe the chapter, it's intense and just... it worked for me. This came on my ipod the other day and I immediately sprinted to my computer to read Chapter 20. No matter what, Chapter 20 is probably the best writing I'm ever going to do, and it's by far the closest to my heart.

So... Energy:

The icon's vamp themed!

The countdown's started. Every day I glance at my calender at that tiny circle around the date. I know it's not a big deal for a lot of people, but I'm excited. I was afraid I wouldn't be back in the swing of things but I am. It probably doesn't make sense, but being gone for so long (in the fanfiction world, being gone for a long time is like a week) and coming back with something is scary. There has been some awesome fanfiction flying around lately, and I'm nervous. I feel better now that I have a sustantial amount of work in front of me so I'm not guessing myself constantly, but I'm still dreading/praying for the date.

Onto better things:

I GOT MY NEW MOON TICKETS!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, I'm so pumped right now. Even though I cried all of the book, I don't care. This is going to be awesome. I was one of the few Twilight fans that actually liked the movie after I read the books, so I'm really excited right now. The Italy scene is going to be epic. It's my favorite scene in the entire series, above everything else in Eclipse (which would be the favorite book) and Twilight and just gah.... I'm so pumped. Seriously, November 20th cannot come any faster. It's going to be so worth me balling my eyes out for the first three quarters of the movie to just see Italy. Oh my god...

And of course, even though I hope his character falls off a cliff and drowns and dies, this is just so damn sexy. Love Taylor:


So sexy...

And because I'm Team Edward (not Rob), I feel I need to post some love for him too:



WHY IS IT NOT NOVEMBER 20th?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For the record, I had planned to post this preview long before I had any discussion on fanforum about posting something. It's a short snippet that I hope you will find relatively enjoyable. And if you hate it, well... better tell me now before I post the story next month.

And I give you a preview of Fourteen Minutes:

( because all it took was Fourteen Minutes for her to... )